shaxper
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Post by shaxper on Nov 22, 2014 1:46:25 GMT -5
An iphone 6 is hardly a necessity. There are many, many other more affordable options out there, including those new government subsidized phones for families living under the poverty level.
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Post by Randle-El on Nov 22, 2014 1:53:02 GMT -5
Oh, I agree that keeping a family together that is completely non-functional is far worse than divorce. I said as much in describing my own family growing up. But there's an innate selfishness and immaturity I see in more and more parents these days. It's even more apparent now than it was when I began teaching nine years ago. I think it stems from rampant consumerism and materialism, as the current generation of parents grew up in the '70s and '80s as coddled children of the baby boomers. They want things their way and don't understand or don't care as much about concepts like self-sacrifice, duty to your family, and being a role model. This is a sweeping generation, of course. After all, I'M a parent from this generation too, but the number of students I have who don't have enough food at home while their parent has the newest iphone, or who can't type their essay at home because their parent refused to stop gambling on the computer, or even just the sheer number of parents who now drink or do worse in front of their kids, often even sharing with them. You could argue it's just the neighborhood I teach in that's gone downhill, but it's a middle class suburban community in Northeast Ohio -- pretty much an "Everytown, America" in a lot of respects. Interesting to hear you say that, because I see similar behavioral patterns where I live, albeit manifested in ways unique to the culture of my area. The suburbs of Washington D.C., where I live, is consistently ranked as one of the most educated and affluent areas of the country. I think the majority of the people here have college degrees, and the median income is in the six figures. But the common thread I see with what you describe is an attitude of entitlement and consumerism. I think it's because people around here are so educated and successful, so they expect nothing less than the best in everything, and they demand that everyone cater to them. So it's a similar attitude, just played out a little differently because people have money and influence. The most blatant evidence of this is from stories I hear from folks who work with kids. My wife is a pediatrician, and several of my friends are school teachers or sports coaches. And they all say the same thing about parents around here -- they are crazy. The teachers get an earful from parents whenever they give "bad" grades to their children, worried that the C+ he got on last week's paper will ruin his chances at getting into Harvard. Or the friends who are coaches constantly get hassled by the stage moms and dads, asking why he didn't call this play, or sub this player out so their kid could play, etc. And the thing is, those parents are used to getting their way because a lot of them are Very Important People in their respective fields. |
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Post by Deleted on Nov 22, 2014 1:57:36 GMT -5
My job actually requires both a tablet and a smartphone, and the software custom made by my company specifically for my job is only for IOS, so it basically requires an iPad and an iPhone. Cheaper Android tablets/phones aren't going to work at my job unless the guy who makes our software decides to make it compatible with Android, which he had no interest in doing last time I saw him. So if I had a phone with a large enough screen, maybe I could eliminate the need for a tablet, but either way, I'm going to have to have some expensive toys to do my job. Not sure the Obamaphone is going to cut it in my line of work.
Now, I doubt the parent you've met works in the same field as me, but there are plenty of reasons I would reserve judgement based solely on someone's phone. Unless it was like a Tag Heuer, Porsche Design, or Ulysse Nardin, vanity phones strictly made to show off how much money you have. But I remember when the new iPhone came out I saw a Best Buy ad saying you could get the phone for $300 and you get a $300 Best Buy gift card. Someone could have potentially gotten the $300 phone and gift card, then just sold the gift card on eBay, making the phone free. I don't have the new iPhone, but I do have an iPhone, and it was the free phone at the Verizon store when I got it.
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shaxper
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Post by shaxper on Nov 22, 2014 2:01:55 GMT -5
Now, I doubt the parent you've met works in the same field as me, but there are plenty of reasons I would reserve judgement based solely on someone's phone. Well of course. If I see a caring, compassionate parent pulling out the iphone 6 only when necessary and lavishing attention and/or concern upon his or her poorly clad, underfed child, I'm not going to jump to conclusions. But that's never the case. |
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Post by Deleted on Nov 22, 2014 2:02:20 GMT -5
Oh, I agree that keeping a family together that is completely non-functional is far worse than divorce. I said as much in describing my own family growing up. But there's an innate selfishness and immaturity I see in more and more parents these days. It's even more apparent now than it was when I began teaching nine years ago. I think it stems from rampant consumerism and materialism, as the current generation of parents grew up in the '70s and '80s as coddled children of the baby boomers. They want things their way and don't understand or don't care as much about concepts like self-sacrifice, duty to your family, and being a role model. This is a sweeping generation, of course. After all, I'M a parent from this generation too, but the number of students I have who don't have enough food at home while their parent has the newest iphone, or who can't type their essay at home because their parent refused to stop gambling on the computer, or even just the sheer number of parents who now drink or do worse in front of their kids, often even sharing with them. You could argue it's just the neighborhood I teach in that's gone downhill, but it's a middle class suburban community in Northeast Ohio -- pretty much an "Everytown, America" in a lot of respects. Interesting to hear you say that, because I see similar behavioral patterns where I live, albeit manifested in ways unique to the culture of my area. The suburbs of Washington D.C., where I live, is consistently ranked as one of the most educated and affluent areas of the country. I think the majority of the people here have college degrees, and the median income is in the six figures. But the common thread I see with what you describe is an attitude of entitlement and consumerism. I think it's because people around here are so educated and successful, so they expect nothing less than the best in everything, and they demand that everyone cater to them. So it's a similar attitude, just played out a little differently because people have money and influence. The most blatant evidence of this is from stories I hear from folks who work with kids. My wife is a pediatrician, and several of my friends are school teachers or sports coaches. And they all say the same thing about parents around here -- they are crazy. The teachers get an earful from parents whenever they give "bad" grades to their children, worried that the C+ he got on last week's paper will ruin his chances at getting into Harvard. Or the friends who are coaches constantly get hassled by the stage moms and dads, asking why he didn't call this play, or sub this player out so their kid could play, etc. And the thing is, those parents are used to getting their way because a lot of them are Very Important People in their respective fields. My uncles kid just started school, and within a couple days there was talk he may have a learning disability and the school recommended he be checked out. My uncle went ballistic on them. Ranted on Facebook about how he's removing his kid from that school, and either private schooling or home schooling him. And he said teachers don't do their jobs anymore. I knew he was upset so I didn't say anything, but why was his kid singled out? If it's all the teachers fault, why aren't all the kids mistakenly being diagnosed with learning disabilities? How come some kids can make it in public school just fine? Why would he remove his kid from school altogether before getting him some early help that maybe he can overcome and eventually finish school in normal, or even advanced classes? It's because he clearly loves his kid, and that was not what he wanted to hear, but his reaction to the news was pretty immature. He's since gotten over it, I don't know if my cousin does have a learning disability or not, or what happened since. |
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Post by Deleted on Nov 22, 2014 2:03:21 GMT -5
Now, I doubt the parent you've met works in the same field as me, but there are plenty of reasons I would reserve judgement based solely on someone's phone. Well of course. If I see a caring, compassionate parent pulling out the iphone 6 only when necessary and lavishing attention and/or concern upon his or her poorly clad, underfed child, I'm not going to jump to conclusions. But that's never the case. If other factors are at play, and simple ownership of the phone aren't the basis for your thoughts on the parent, then that's another story. I'm not there to see first hand what you're seeing of course. Maybe the parents are just douchebags |
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shaxper
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Post by shaxper on Nov 22, 2014 2:04:17 GMT -5
Maybe the parents are just douchebags More narcissistic than anything, but yes. |
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Post by Icctrombone on Nov 22, 2014 8:01:41 GMT -5
I remember placing a question on FB a few years ago about these toys. I asked is it okay for someone on welfare that is waiting every week on a pantry line to own an ipad. I got lots of mixed answers. It is the "me" generation for sure.
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Post by Deleted on Nov 22, 2014 8:08:17 GMT -5
Interesting to hear you say that, because I see similar behavioral patterns where I live, albeit manifested in ways unique to the culture of my area. The suburbs of Washington D.C., where I live, is consistently ranked as one of the most educated and affluent areas of the country. I think the majority of the people here have college degrees, and the median income is in the six figures. But the common thread I see with what you describe is an attitude of entitlement and consumerism. I think it's because people around here are so educated and successful, so they expect nothing less than the best in everything, and they demand that everyone cater to them. So it's a similar attitude, just played out a little differently because people have money and influence. The most blatant evidence of this is from stories I hear from folks who work with kids. My wife is a pediatrician, and several of my friends are school teachers or sports coaches. And they all say the same thing about parents around here -- they are crazy. The teachers get an earful from parents whenever they give "bad" grades to their children, worried that the C+ he got on last week's paper will ruin his chances at getting into Harvard. Or the friends who are coaches constantly get hassled by the stage moms and dads, asking why he didn't call this play, or sub this player out so their kid could play, etc. And the thing is, those parents are used to getting their way because a lot of them are Very Important People in their respective fields. My uncles kid just started school, and within a couple days there was talk he may have a learning disability and the school recommended he be checked out. My uncle went ballistic on them. Ranted on Facebook about how he's removing his kid from that school, and either private schooling or home schooling him. And he said teachers don't do their jobs anymore. I knew he was upset so I didn't say anything, but why was his kid singled out? If it's all the teachers fault, why aren't all the kids mistakenly being diagnosed with learning disabilities? How come some kids can make it in public school just fine? Why would he remove his kid from school altogether before getting him some early help that maybe he can overcome and eventually finish school in normal, or even advanced classes? It's because he clearly loves his kid, and that was not what he wanted to hear, but his reaction to the news was pretty immature. He's since gotten over it, I don't know if my cousin does have a learning disability or not, or what happened since. It's because, as parents, a lot of time, we are not initially open to hearing there is something "abnormal", "unusual" or even "different" about our children. Now that I know the school system a little better (at least my local district), a school teacher is never going to tell you your child has a disability of sorts without him/her honestly believing the child does. NO ONE working for a school is going to intentionally go out seeking a way for the school to spend MORE money. Because, when a child has a disability of sorts, IEPs (individual educational plans) have to be arranged (every parent needs to know about this right), and those alone cost money because they require school staff to attend, and they require money spent to meet each child's individual needs. Now, I'm not saying there aren't teachers out there who are less-than-desirable people (they're human, after all), but I really grow tired of a lot of the "in general" bashing of teachers I hear or see. Teachers deal with sooooo much. Some teachers have to teach, and deal with, up to 30 students per classroom. That is CRAZY. That's about 28 more children than I would feel comfortable dealing with. |
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Post by Icctrombone on Nov 22, 2014 8:58:02 GMT -5
I exchanged emails with her when this first happened. At first the owner refused to sell it back to her. He was feeling pressure and agreed to sell it back to her ( At a mark up price ) but he would only give it to her. In the intervening time, she'd moved to NY state and couldn't get off work to be there to receive the books and the CS owner refused to give it to the people that volunteered to get the books for her. She took it at a loss and collateral damage of a failed relationship. That's still really weird and I just can't fathom why he'd have a problem with someone else picking up books she'd purchase. Just a guess, but i figured he really didn't want to sell it back and or he was afraid he was getting scammed himself by strangers picking up the books. |
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Post by Deleted on Nov 22, 2014 9:05:28 GMT -5
That's still really weird and I just can't fathom why he'd have a problem with someone else picking up books she'd purchase. Just a guess, but i figured he really didn't want to sell it back and or he was afraid he was getting scammed himself by strangers picking up the books. He might be uncomfortable with someone else picking up the books, if he knows about the situation, because it's a divorce situation, and he may be afraid he's getting involved with some possibly legal issues with property, and if he doesn't know who is picking up the books, then he cannot be sure they're going into the intended hands? I'm not sticking up for the store guy, because I honestly think he shouldn't have bought the books to begin with, but he may not have known it was a divorce situation then. He might now? |
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Post by Icctrombone on Nov 22, 2014 9:23:01 GMT -5
I believe it was a same sex partnership but I'm not sure they were married. But if he wasn't afraid when he was getting the books at a steal, why should he think like a lawyer now?
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Post by Deleted on Nov 22, 2014 9:37:37 GMT -5
I believe it was a same sex partnership but I'm not sure they were married. But if he wasn't afraid when he was getting the books at a steal, why should he think like a lawyer now? Because he might not have known the books were being sold as a result of a spiteful husband acting out against his wife? I'm not sure if it stated that the store owner KNEW the guy was selling his wife's comics because they were separated. And unless it's stated otherwise, the husband probably didn't walk in there and state, "Yeah, I've got these books I want to sell because my wife and I are divorcing and I'm being a spiteful dick." |
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Post by thwhtguardian on Nov 22, 2014 10:38:33 GMT -5
That's still really weird and I just can't fathom why he'd have a problem with someone else picking up books she'd purchase. Just a guess, but i figured he really didn't want to sell it back and or he was afraid he was getting scammed himself by strangers picking up the books. It seems like a simple transaction, if she says,"I give permission to John Q Citizen to pick up my books." then all the owner has to do is check the licence of whoever comes to the shop for the books. Plenty of stores do that kind of transaction every day so I don't see what the deal is. |
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Post by rom on Sept 9, 2016 14:36:29 GMT -5
Digging up this old thread, since I just read the story in the OP. Truly sickening. It's horrible that this woman's ex was able to screw her by selling all of these old (and in many cases valuable) comics without her consent. Her ex was a real P.O.S.
Reading stories like this make me glad I'm single. I've lived with various women over the years & considered getting married at times, but am glad I didn't. I don't want to enter into a legally binding contract with a woman that will enable her to legally screw me financially & take away everything I own.
I have known guys who have lost everything in a divorce, and it's really sad. I'm sure this happens to women as well in some cases - as evidenced by the article in the OP.
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