Gene Day's Julius Caesar looks like it was taken straight from an ancient Roman sculpture - and is all the more effective for it, capturing the unique combination of intellectual capacity of the highest rank with indomitable determination and focus of purpose that I'm always impressed with in those portraits.

In the Steve Englehart thread I was just wondering what Englehart might have done if his career at Marvel hadn't been cut short by internal politics. Who knows what wonders Gene Day would have created if he hadn't died at so young an age.

Eyes of G'Bharr R'Jinn! 
Script by Michael Fleisher
Art by Rudy Nebres

Apostrophes! Bor'Aq Sharaq! A convoluted plot! Bad religion! This one has it all!

Well, let's be fair... it also has very good art by Rudy Nebres. Rudy's pencils may not convey as much emotion as that of other artists, but his lush and dense art is very nice to look at. It carries a certain exoticism that made Rudy's inking over Gil Kane's pencils such a treat on Marvel's John Carter book.



The story is another adventure tale wherein that tenacious pirate, captain Bor'Aqh Sharaq, continues on his never-ending quest to get revenge on Conan the Cimmerian. Not even death can stop him! Thrown off the top window of a high tower in issue 75, crushed to a pulp by a demon in issue 83, turned into crystal in issue 92, he always manages to come back like a bad penny!

Last issue, Conan and his lady friend Jessica had forced Bor'Aqh Sharaq to retreat with an arrow in his shoulder. The pre-story blurb (the one that's supposedly based on Miller and Clark's "probable outline of Conan's career", Marvel's reference in terms of Hyborian continuity) tells us that after issue #106 Conan went back to his life as a Barachan corsair and returned to land after six months.

This interlude at sea is unnecessary for the tale and fits so poorly in the continuity that I would strongly suggest to ignore it altogether. For the chronologists out there, let's remember that Conan becomes a Barachan corsair around the age of 35-36; after an ill-defined length of time he has to escape rival Barachan pirates on a sinking rowboat and is picked up by a Zingaran ship, of which he quickly gains control, at the age of 37 (see The pool of the Black one, adapted in SSoC 22-23). He has further adventures at sea (such as those from SSoC #40-43) before eventually returning to dry land and serving as a mercenary in Stygia (see Red nails, adapted in ST #2-3), when he must be nearing 38; after that he has to travel to the southern kingdom of Keshan (The teeth of Gwahlur, adapted in SSoC #25) and then Punt (The ivory goddess, adapted in SSoC #60) before returning back to the northwest and becoming a frontier scout in Conajohara, at which time the Outline says he must be about 39. That tight schedule leaves very little time for months-long adventures or diversions. Not to forget that a previous issue had a full year elapse between #75 and #92, which is really pushing things. Sure, we could argue that most of Conan's career as a Barachan corsair was actually spent on dry land, with him returning to sea only from time to time... that would give us the necessary months in which to fit these Bor'Aq Sharaq land-bound adventures. But is that satisfying?

Anyway, I know the writers want to tell fun stories first and that few of them really pay attention to how stories are supposed to fit together. So let's get on with today's tale.

Conan ingratiates himself to a very rich Argossean trader by rescuing his beautiful daughter from would-be kidnappers. He is invited to the man's palace as a honoured guest, and the daughter shows strong attraction to her brawny saviour (enough to slip into his room when the night comes).



Meanwhile, captain Bor'Aqh Sharaq (who has recovered his lost quiver of weapons, apparently) tries to hire some help to pursue his dream of vengeance against the Cimmerian. In an Argossean seaside tavern, he is mocked by sailors who suggest that he should give up his dream and return to honest piracy. Stung by such a cavalier attitude, Bor'Aqh Sharaq kills a few of the patrons then locks the tavern from the outside and sets it on fire, burning everyone in it alive. Now unless that tavern is a converted barn, I would have a few things to say to its architect. What's the deal with a tavern door that's locked from the outside with a heavy wooden beam? Is it to make sure none of the customers leave until they've paid their tab? And why are there no windows at all in the building? Is it to keep the smell locked in? Is there no fire safety department in Argos?

The captain then continues his mission alone. As in previous occasions, he is looking for magical trinkets that should make it easier for him to kill Conan. This time he wants the two Eyes of G'Bharr R'Jinn, jewels that respectively cast intense cold and eldritch fire. One is kept in the house of a certain regional governor, which the pirate enters nightly. He meets some resistance form guards, but also from a competing thief: the Khitan woman Snow Raven, from SSoC #95. Impressed by the lady's skills with bolas, Bor'Aqh Sharaq offers a deal: once he has used the jewel to fulfill his mission or vengeance, he will let her depart with it.

The second jewel is kept (as fate would have it) in the treasure room of the merchant who's currently hosting Conan. Bor'Aqh Sharaq and Snow Raven enter the house and find the jewel protected by a cage of iron. Using the eye already in his possession, the ice-casting one, the pirate freezes the cage and renders it brittle before smashing it to bits and recovering the second eye.

Having heard the noise of the cage being broken, Conan gets out of bed and tries to stop the thieves. What good fortune! Bor'Aqh Sharaq won't have to track down the Cimmerian! But even with the two eyes in his possession, Bor'Aqh Sharaq fails to kill his enemy despite zapping him repeatedly with magic fire, a fire that Conan avoids by using several objects as shields (quickly turned to slag) and by jumping around like a great cat. The pirate has to retreat with Snow Raven in tow. No wonder those pirates made fun of him! He's now got the powers of Iceman and the Human Torch and he still can't defeat an unarmed man in a loincloth!

After all this commotion, the merchant shows amazing good grace by thanking Conan for having tried to stop the thieves even if they smashed many of his priceless works of art to pieces and made away with the magical jewel.

That very night, Snow Raven reenters the merchant's house, intent on warning Conan about how dangerous Bor'Aqh Sharaq is. Having apparently forgotten their previous antagonistic relation, she even decides to stay the night and, in the words of Iago, "play the beast with two backs". This is however witnessed by the merchant's daughter who is peeping through the keyhole, and she concludes that her beau is actually in league with the thieves!

Snow Raven departs and rejoins Bor'Aqh Sharaq, who suspects that she's been with his archenemy. Calling her a "dark-tressed little bird" (which is odd, since Snow Raven has white hair) he turns her into ice with one of the eyes of G'Bharr R'Jinn. Meanwhile, Conan has also left the merchant's house before he could be arrested for complicity, and is following Snow Raven's tracks in the hope of finding the pirate and recovering the stolen jewel.

Finding his paramour encased in a block of ice at the bottom of a shallow and wide well, Conan jumps in and is immediately attacked by Bor'Aqh Sharaq, who has now installed the two eyes in the slits of his full-face helmet, casting freezing rays from one side and searing fire from the other! But lo and behold, the fire doesn't burn Conan; as Bor'Aqh Sharaq conveniently explains, the eye doesn't seem to work on living beings the same way as it does on inanimate objects. (This makes little sense, even for a magical trinket. Besides, in an earlier description of what the jewels could do, we saw it burn a man in armour; it seemed to work fine then). But anyway... The fire may not be hurting Conan, but it does drain his strength away. Its heat is also enough to cause Snow Raven's frozen prison to melt, and Bor'Aqh Sharaq explains that as the ice melts, so will its prisoner, her body turning to water; and the meltwater will fill the well and drown Conan.



Oh, boy. Talk about dropping out of school early to live the exciting life of a pirate. Look, Bor'Aqh, there is NO WAY a melting block of ice can fill a volume several times its own! None! What you say makes no sense, man! And with water it's even worse because ice has a lower density than liquid water and your ice will occupy even less volume once it's melted!

The block of ice looks pretty thick still, but apparently it melted right in the proper spot for the weakened Conan to reach for Raven's bolas hanging from her belt. He throws them at Bor'Aqh's neck and the helmet fall off. The angry pirate decides to attack with steel after all! To hell with those magical jewels!



Well, the whole plan peters out, Snow Raven is freed from her frozen prison and Bor'Aqh Sharaq ends up encased in ice himself. Snow Raven suggests that Conan could easily break him into tiny shards at this point, but that is not the Cimmerian's way; he'll just let the pirate melt little by little. As for the recovered jewel, she says that knowing Conan as she does, he'll doubtless go and give it back to the merchant.

Yes, that is unfortunately exactly what this version of Conan would do. Howard's Conan would have pawned it for beer money.


Notes:

- What's the point of stealing magical weapons all the time? What's wrong with a good old-fashioned ambush with half a dozen archers? Much easier to arrange and it gets the job done. Also, when you have a weapon that can turn people into ice, why bother with a matching one that can cast fire? There's such a think as overkill when it comes to magical tools. And when it comes to tactics, instead of baiting an enemy with his frozen lover and making grand declarations about how the hour of revenge has tolled, why not wait until he's sleeping, or taking a dump, or distracted by amorous activities, and freeze him when his guard is down?

- This is the last time we see Bor'Aqh Sharaq, even if his fate doesn't seem as drastic here as it was in issues #75, 83 and 92. Perhaps upon being freed from the melting ice he did follow the tavern patrons' advice and returned to a simpler life of piracy.

- This is also the last time we see Snow Raven. Well, that is... The last time we see this particular Snow Raven. Another Khitan with the same name will appear in SSoC #132, but is clearly a different character.

- It's not clear why Snow Raven's frozen form was supposed to melt away entirely (her body as well as the encasing ice) but ended up being simply freed. Perhaps Bor'Aqh simply had no idea of what an ice-encased body does nor what the magic eye actually did.

- Still consistent, the pirate continues swearing by obscure Cimmerian gods. Oh, well.

Savage sword of Conan #108, January 1985



Cover by Joe Jusko. The harpy-like creature here is not exactly found inside the mag, but the book does feature a regular guy wearing the wings of a great bird.


Table of contents

Claws of the osprey, a long Conan adventure 
Fear of Crom, a short and amusing one.

Usurping the identity of a gladiator, Conan enters the enemy city under the pretence of taking part in its ruler's next games, Gorbek being a great fan of gladiatorial bouts (while his wife is a great fan of gladiators, as Conan will discover first-hand).



The secret weapon is revealed: it is a whole fleet of hang gliders. Conan rides back to Nerval's city and prepares its defense accordingly (preparing the catapults so they'll throw flaming projectiles at the incoming flying machines). He is attacked on the battlements by the winged Pol Tiurno, who has meanwhile been killing cattle and people like a crazy bird of prey. Taken up in the air again, Conan manages to set fire to Tiurno's wings and both men fall. Conan manages not to break his neck, in an interestingly-designed page, while Tiurno falls over the horizon like a screaming shooting star.

The end of the story is interesting in that the last five pages are silent. Not one word is seen for the final attack and defeat of lord Gormek's forces. It is actually quite an effective storytelling approach!








Notes:

- Several pages of this issue are devoted to setting up next issue, which will reintroduce Wrarrl, the devourer of souls. His return involves magic that demands killing people and the use of "the jewel of Ganjammide", which is hidden in a cavern. (That's the spare magical jewel Wrarrl used in issue 96 to bring some of his people to our world. I don't know how it ended up in a cavern again. Perhaps Wrarrl put it back once he was done with it, before being killed by the end of #96). The people trying to bring Wrarrl back are his lumpy-headed compatriots last seen in that issue; I had thought them all killed by the ghost sailors summoned by Conan's girlfriend's self-sacrifice. Live and learn, I guess.

- Hard to tell when this adventure occurs, but since Wrarrl has already shown up and that he'll go away for good in CtB#200, this story must occur when Conan is something like 27 years old.

- Kwapisz used to swipe a lot. The third image from last was traced from a Hal Foster Prince Valiant picture, as revealed by an eagle-eyed reader from Spain, Fernando Veiga.

Don't worry - from the looks of that cover, your disdain for her costume is about to be justified when those two arrows go through her head, to join the one that already appears to have skewered her left arm.

The shatterer of worlds
Script by Michael Fleisher
Art by Gary Kwapisz and Ernie Chan

This month's main tale is an adventure/comedy that could be compared to, say, Eddie Murphy's The golden child. The stakes are very high (the end of the world!!!) but the delivery is comedic. In this type of story, you never actually worry for the main character; unlike what happened in the more dramatic issue #105, where the Cimmerian was almost killed by a handful of ordinary men, here he can face an entire army and we just know he'll end up on top, with a quip and a wink, before riding off into the sunset with a saucy wench at his arm.

I explained earlier how this issue introduces Conan's biographer, the young Nemedian scribe Nicos Iristides. Nicos is eager, clumsy, prone to daydreaming, quite innocent in the ways of the world, but not lacking in personal courage. He also suffers from a bad case of hero worship for his object of study.

We open with a ceremony taking place in an old ruin, following the events from last issue: the lumpy-headed followers the deceased Wrarrl, the devourer of souls, are trying to resurrect the lifeless form of their leader. They have the magical jewel of Ganjammide obtained last issue, as well as enough "harlot's blood" to indulge in the required ceremonial libation. Because of their overeagerness, the blood is spilled and the ceremony must be postponed for two weeks.

Let's now skip to the academy of the Nemedian chroniclers in Belverus, where some expository dialog proves that Nemedian scholars subscribe to Savage Sword of Conan.



In the halls of the great building where legions of scribe are busy recording the comings and goings of unimportant individuals like one Conan of Cimmeria, young Nicos Irsitides tells one of his elders about things nobody can know about unless they have read SSoC #96. He describes how Wrarrl used the jewel of Ganjammide to summon some of his other-dimensional followers to our world, how he went after Conan to get revenge for the defeat suffered in issue #90, and how Conan's girlfriend Lia sacrificed herself to save the Cimmerian's life. No matter that Wrarrl's alien nature is not public knowledge nor that his use of the Ganjammide jewel is known only to his own people; how could Nicos know about the tragic events from issue #96 since everybody but Conan was dead at the end?

Setting up this issue's events with some more expository talk, the elder tells Nicos that it's a good thing the jewel wasn't used a little later, as in, say, two weeks from now; for then, given the planets' alignments, it would have opened the door to a creature far more terrible that Wrarrl's people: it would have left our earth open for the arrival of the shatterer of worlds. (I am amazed at the astronomical precision of these Nemedian scholars. I doubt two weeks' time does much to the planets' alignment, which is never more than a very approximative thing anyway).

As Nikos goes to town to get scribing supplies, he is teased by many of the town's prostitutes who all seem to have taken a liking to the shy young man. One of them is murdered by one of Wrarrl's people, because some more blood is needed to perform the resurrection ceremony again. (I hope these guys have an ample supply of anticoagulant, because that blood's going to clot pretty quickly... in two weeks, it's gonna be a little red rock).

Nikos happens upon the woman's body, and becomes convinced that Wrarrl's people are involved in the murder, and are about to use the jewel of Ganjammide again, because there is no simpler explanation. I mean, it's so obvious. Whenever a prostitute gets murdered in this world, it's because a devil-cult from another dimension is trying to resurrect its leader.

Naturally, as we have learned earlier, such an attempt may mean the arrival of the shatterer of worlds and the end of ours.

Nicos'  elders at the academy scoff his preposterous claims and think he has let Conan's adventures go to his head. The Nemedian authorities pay him no more heed, claiming that if they had enough manpower they wouldn't go chasing after demonic cults but after brigands like Conan the Cimmerian.

"That's it"! realizes Nicos. Conan would believe him and help stop the cultists! And so the young scribe sets on the trail of the Cimmerian. Unknown to him, he is tailed by a Nemedian policeman, just in case he manages to ferret out the wanted man.

On his way, the young man meets many people whose lives have recently been affected by the Cimmerian. First, survivors a group of soldiers cut to pieces by a mercenary battalion Conan was leading. Then the owner of a tavern he trashed during a bar fight. Next comes a brothel full of exhausted and delighted ladies. Then a band of Conan's ex-colleagues in crime with whom he had an argument regarding the proper division of bounty. One has lost a leg, another an arm, another an eye, and yet another was hit on the head so hard that he hasn't said a word since and keeps giggling to himself. Other such encounters show that Conan tends to generate a lot of ill-will in his dealings with people.

As Nicos is searching for him, the barbarian is busy fulfilling a mission for which he was hired by a young man whose girlfriend is forced by her father to marry an old merchant. Conan interrupts the ceremony just in time and flees with the damsel, incurring the wrath of the groom and of the bride's father; and since the girl is rather taken by her dashing rescuer and suggests that they should really get better acquainted in some hotel room, Conan also incurs the wrath of the girl's boyfriend.

Nicos Iristides, after days and days on his quest, still hasn't found his quarry. Despairing in his hotel room that he'll never manage to stop the cultists in time and complaining about the couple next door making a lot of noise in their frolics, he hears someone exclaim "Crom!" and takes it upon himself to interrupt his neighbours' activities,  sure that he's at last found Conan. 



Conan is unimpressed and Nicos concludes that he'll have to stop the cultists on his own.

(Parenthesis: the contrast between a bookish Nemedian scholar and a burly Cimmerian is used again in Tim Truman's and Tomas Giorello's King Conan miniseries -The Scarlet citadel, The Hour of the Dragon and The Phoenix on the Sword- from Dark Horse, although the scribe Pramis has a somewhat better relation with the king than does Nikos).



Now I have no idea how Nicos found their temple, but he is there in a matter of minutes. It's not as if there's a big sign over the ruins saying "here be Wrarrl cultists" or even as if that temple has long been used by their cult, since they are from another dimension and only recently come to our world. Let's chalk it up to the scribe's apparent omniscience and leave it at that.

Some plot-required coincidence then imposes a new condition to the cultists' reiteration of the resurrection ceremony: on top of harlot's blood, they must have that of a bride who spent her wedding night away from the groom. What luck! There is precisely one who is said to be in a local inn, where she was taken by a barbarian named* "his name is unimportant".

Hiding his features under a rag such as the cultists wear, Nicos gains access to the old temple and manages to steal the jewel of Ganjammide, making good his escape and scattering the cultists' horses while he's at it, "just as Conan would have done!"

Nicos once again interrupts Conan's tryst, jewel of Ganjammide in hand, just before the cultists show up (their horses not having run far). "Curse it, boy! They're a lot like you , these fiends! They think my patience is inexhaustible!"



In the following fight, Conan is caught in a collapsing structure and left for dead while the lumpheads retreat with the lady and with Nicos, who will be charged to write down the details of their coming triumph. But naturally Conan isn't hurt, and he steals a horse to go after the group.

The Cimmerian is however himself chased by all those he has wronged in this issue: the bride's father, the bride's boyfriend, the bride's groom, all their hired swords, and the Nemedian authorities. The competing factions come to blows over who has priority in matters of revenge, and Conan manages to escape them.

The surviving pursuers chase him all the way to a narrow canyon and claim to have trapped him, only to discover that they were following a riderless horse. Conan jumps from a hiding spot behind them, taunting the whole lot. "It's like a pack of hares claiming they have trapped a wolf!" And then he defeats them all without getting a scratch. (Told you... this issue's violence is strictly treated as a comedic element).

This distraction has allowed the cultists to begin their ceremony. Conan, too, apparently guessed where the cultists were hiding and although he arrives in time to skewer the main officiant before he can ritually murder the abducted bride, the ceremonial dagger does scratch the lady's neck and a few drops of blood are drawn, enough for the spell to function.

(That reminds me of that scene in "Pirates of the Caribbean", where Barbossa only uses a few drops of Elizabeth's blood while she was convinced he'd open her throat. "Waste not", he then remarks with a mischievous smile)!

Wrarrl awakens, stands up once more and engages Conan with his lightining-laced sword. But then he realizes with horror that his idiotic servants have performed the ritual exactly on the wrong night, and that the shatterer of worlds has been freed as a result, threatening not only Earth but also Wrarrl's own world!



(The shatterer of worlds looks pretty much like how I envision the Flying Spaghetti Monster).

Using some heretofore unknown abilities, Wrarrl flies to the shatterer of worlds and both creatures mutually annihilate each other.

Conan, his lover and Nicos walk away from the rubble, observing that the scribe will really have something to write about.


Notes:

- As comedy/adventure goes, this was pretty good despite all the plot holes. The accumulation of people with missing limbs, with destroyed taverns or other grievances all wanting a piece of Conan's hide was funny.

- Conan is around 27, as must be all the tales with Wrarrl that precede Conan the barbarian #200.

- I am grateful that the priest of Mitra officiating the wedding at least invoked Mitra, but there's plenty of Nemedians then swearing by Ishtar. O, ye gods.