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Post by Paste Pot Paul on Jan 1, 2017 19:47:50 GMT -5
Around straight people, I try to hide it behind my veganism and allergies, and they are of course legitimate, but this is primarily about my gender identity... I don't like wearing makeup. There I said it. I have been growing my hair out, and I'm a little helpless in managing it. I used to feel like I had to keep my hair fairly short in order be accepted as queer or to even be attractive. Now that my hair is so long, I get a lot more unwanted attention and harassment for it and I have almost cut it a number of times; yesterday morning for example. I would have done it too, if someone had not been there to stop me. I want to have long hair though, because I like it; not for anyone else. There I said it. Why do you have to get approval from others for how you look ? Regardless of whether youre straight or gay or gloriously ambivalent, be you for you and if someone likes that then hey, its even better. Me, I like long hair on women, tell my lady this every time she thinks about cutting hers short, but thats me guilting her out to get MY way. If she was really serious, its her business, and honestly she does what she wants, when she wants, how she wants. |
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Post by Paste Pot Paul on Jan 1, 2017 19:50:43 GMT -5
I'm flabbergasted. KFC is just awful. Just the worst lowest common denominator fried chicken. There. I said it! Wow, glad my lady isnt on here to see this, KFC is a Pacific Island institution, I think they all worship there, well the ones I know anyhow  . |
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Post by Icctrombone on Jan 1, 2017 19:55:27 GMT -5
Around straight people, I try to hide it behind my veganism and allergies, and they are of course legitimate, but this is primarily about my gender identity... I don't like wearing makeup. There I said it. I have been growing my hair out, and I'm a little helpless in managing it. I used to feel like I had to keep my hair fairly short in order be accepted as queer or to even be attractive. Now that my hair is so long, I get a lot more unwanted attention and harassment for it and I have almost cut it a number of times; yesterday morning for example. I would have done it too, if someone had not been there to stop me. I want to have long hair though, because I like it; not for anyone else. There I said it. Why do you have to get approval from others for how you look ? Regardless of whether youre straight or gay or gloriously ambivalent, be you for you and if someone likes that then hey, its even better. Me, I like long hair on women, tell my lady this every time she thinks about cutting hers short, but thats me guilting her out to get MY way. If she was really serious, its her business, and honestly she does what she wants, when she wants, how she wants.There's nothing wrong with a person wearing their hair a certain way or dressing a certain way to please their partner. My wife likes when I wear dress pants and I nice dress shirt so I make the effort to do it for her. |
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Post by adamwarlock2099 on Jan 1, 2017 20:11:06 GMT -5
Why do you have to get approval from others for how you look ? Regardless of whether youre straight or gay or gloriously ambivalent, be you for you and if someone likes that then hey, its even better. Me, I like long hair on women, tell my lady this every time she thinks about cutting hers short, but thats me guilting her out to get MY way. If she was really serious, its her business, and honestly she does what she wants, when she wants, how she wants.There's nothing wrong with a person wearing their hair a certain way or dressing a certain way to please their partner. My wife likes when I wear dress pants and I nice dress shirt so I make the effort to do it for her. I like my wife to have long er hair. What's too long is on her. She prefers me with long hair. But just wants hair on me in general. If I had my way I bic my scalp. The other things I like her .... and she likes me..... PG-13; Nevermind |
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shaxper
CCF Site Custodian
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Post by shaxper on Jan 2, 2017 2:17:27 GMT -5
I was initially just getting something off my chest and didn't expect anyone to quote me except for maybe one of the other women here, and I did continue that discussion in PM. I had kind of forgotten what I said in that first post and should've deleted it before it was quoted. I should've ignored it. I don't know what I was thinking. I can't talk about this. Didn't realize men weren't welcome to respond. Upsetting as that is, I'll delete my reply if you like. I was just trying to help. |
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Post by Paste Pot Paul on Jan 2, 2017 2:29:20 GMT -5
I was just trying to be supportive, and hoping like hell I wasnt being insensitive as well. Any of my words you may have misconstrued were certainly never meant that way.
I shave my head, old bald man disease, so am always envious of those of you who have the damn stuff.
Peace
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shaxper
CCF Site Custodian
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Post by shaxper on Jan 2, 2017 2:33:32 GMT -5
I was just trying to be supportive, and hoping like hell I wasnt being insensitive as well. Any of my words you may have misconstrued were certainly never meant that way. I don't think either of us needs to apologize for having a penis. Your response was thoughtful and caring, and I'd like to think mine was too. That being said, if SS would like me to delete my reply to her, I will make it so. Just say the word. |
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Confessor
CCF Mod Squad
Not Bucky O'Hare!
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Post by Confessor on Jan 2, 2017 4:10:46 GMT -5
I was initially just getting something off my chest and didn't expect anyone to quote me except for maybe one of the other women here, and I did continue that discussion in PM. I had kind of forgotten what I said in that first post and should've deleted it before it was quoted. I should've ignored it. I don't know what I was thinking. I can't talk about this. Didn't realize men weren't welcome to respond. Upsetting as that is, I'll delete my reply if you like. I was just trying to help. I was just trying to be supportive, and hoping like hell I wasnt being insensitive as well. Any of my words you may have misconstrued were certainly never meant that way. I shave my head, old bald man disease, so am always envious of those of you who have the damn stuff. Peace Your replies were both fine, guys. They were thoughtful, supportive and coming from a good place. This is a discussion forum and, as such, any post by anybody is fair game for anyone else to reply to. If you only want certain members to reply then PMs are the way to go. |
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Post by Icctrombone on Jan 2, 2017 6:02:25 GMT -5
Just going to chime in here about attraction- a persons appearance matters. If you want to attract a partner , you usually have to dress in a way to impress. Go to parties, clubs etc, you will not find people dressed in sweat pants. On a first date, person puts their best foot forward. For a man that might be dress pants ,Shoes, cologne, and a shirt and tie. For a female, it might be a dress, make up and an impressive hair style.
It works.
Then your personality has to take over.
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Post by wildfire2099 on Jan 2, 2017 6:45:20 GMT -5
I was told that people like me "deserve" AIDS and that we are "possessed" by members of my extended family when I was little; often at holiday gatherings. I have never come out to them, but they probably suspect by now (but I don't associate with them really). I secretly wish that I could send them my therapy bills everytime I pay them. Wowww.  That is awful. I was told I was a b@st@rd child because my dad was not my mom's first husband, and since the Catholics did not acknowledge divorce, they did not acknowledge my dad being married to my mom, therefore they did not acknowledge me. I was a b@st@Rd. CATHOLICISM IS AWESOME. I was 3 when my parents got married.. my friends used to make a joke out of it... whenever they'd call me a b@st@rd, (mostly when I was beating them in cards or some other game), I'd happily respond, 'yes, what does that have to do with it' and it would make everyone laugh. |
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Post by Icctrombone on Jan 2, 2017 8:30:16 GMT -5
I was 3 when my parents got married.. my friends used to make a joke out of it... whenever they'd call me a b@st@rd, (mostly when I was beating them in cards or some other game), I'd happily respond, 'yes, what does that have to do with it' and it would make everyone laugh. I learned early on that if you show people that something harms you, they will continue to use it. Good job of defusing that situation. |
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Post by Icctrombone on Jan 2, 2017 8:32:34 GMT -5
Didn't realize men weren't welcome to respond. Upsetting as that is, I'll delete my reply if you like. I was just trying to help. I was just trying to be supportive, and hoping like hell I wasnt being insensitive as well. Any of my words you may have misconstrued were certainly never meant that way. I shave my head, old bald man disease, so am always envious of those of you who have the damn stuff. Peace Your replies were both fine, guys. They were thoughtful, supportive and coming from a good place. This is a discussion forum and, as such, any post by anybody is fair game for anyone else to reply to. If you only want certain members to reply then PMs are the way to go. Yes. I thought that was common sense. People only know what you tell them. |
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Post by adamwarlock2099 on Jan 2, 2017 9:41:47 GMT -5
Just before visiting my wife's family for Christmas both my boys, 13 and 10, cut their long hair due to ridicule at school for having it. Society in general has to many "norms" and agendas, and too many people suffer, because other people can't mind their own damned business about what other people do with their lives, what they wear, how they style their hair, etc. It's an annoying human trait.
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shaxper
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Post by shaxper on Jan 2, 2017 9:53:03 GMT -5
Just going to chime in here about attraction- a persons appearance matters. If you want to attract a partner , you usually have to dress in a way to impress. Go to parties, clubs etc, you will not find people dressed in sweat pants. On a first date, person puts their best foot forward. For a man that might be dress pants ,Shoes, cologne, and a shirt and tie. For a female, it might be a dress, make up and an impressive hair style. It works. Then your personality has to take over. I disagree. I'm actually automatically put off by people who look high maintenance/artificial. I am attracted to the kind of person who looks like someone I'd be comfortable with. No makeup and low maintenance hair actually impress me. Its more things like facial expressions, the look in their eyes, and how sincere their smile looks that matters most to me. Now, don't get me wrong. If you look dirty, or if your outfit looks like you literally just picked something up off the floor, that's a negative, but comfortable and low maintenance yet tasteful impress me. My first crush ever was this girl who just tied back her hair every day and wore these cute sweaters and jeans. Every day. Nothing fancy. It was her smile and eyes that won me over most, but the low maintenance preppy look impressed the heck out of me too. Her entire style communicated that she could be classy without feeling she needed to waste hours on her appearance each morning. But, at the end of the day, folks should be dressing up to impress themselves more than a potential mate. |
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Post by Deleted on Jan 2, 2017 10:08:13 GMT -5
As this has become something about hair..... Superman's long hair still annoys me to this day. As much as I liked hair bands in the 90s, he wasn't supposed to look like Rambo.  Having said that, if I straighten my hair it can touch my arse when I really let it grow. But it's naturally wavy. |
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