Teen Titans #3 (June 1966)
"The Revolt at Harrison High"
Script: Bob Haney
Pencils: Nick Cardy
Inks: Nick Cardy
Colors: ?
Letters: Stan Starkman
grade: B+
This may be the worst cover I've ever seen in my life. Not compositionally or anatomically speaking, mind you; it just screams "Put your money away. You absolutely do not want to read this comic." The interior teaser page would have made a far far better choice:
Even just the catchy title for the story ("The Revolt at Harrison High") might have helped.
The story itself is an interesting one. Batmania has clearly spread its greedy tendrils to this little story, as is evident from the very first panels:
Hey, that's
exactly how the Batman TV show episodes open up!
Weirdly enough, we then get three pages of a Batman and Robin story, as the two of them pursue the mysterious car
Batman randomly giving up at the first sign of trouble so that the Titans have something to do for the rest of the issue.
But that's not where the TV show's influence stops. For one thing, Robin is (and, as a result, all of the Titans are) age-progressed to better resemble Burt Ward:
Here's how they looked only a few months back:
and the resemblance to the TV show Robin doesn't stop at the physical level. Much as in Teen Titans #1, we're repeatedly shown that these are
respectful teens who obey adults and all authority:
so when they are once again recruited by an adult in a suit who works for a government agency
(wow this feels familiar)
we're once again given that awkward moment where the rest of the team starts expressing their thoughts until Robin shuts them down fast, reminding them that good kids do what they're told:
The Teen Titans as voice for teens everywhere? That's so far gone that there are now only two people who speak "teen lingo" in this issue.
The first is the villain:
and the second is Robin, posing as a teen delinquent:
Good teens don't speak like that now, I guess.
As in Teen Titans #1 (which this story so clearly resembles in structure), there is a good message being put forth about the dangers of dropping out of high school, but it's still odd to see this book shift so abruptly from being the voice of these youth to being a pseudo government propaganda piece targeted at them instead. Join the peace corps, stay in school, and always respect authority.
All that aside, this was actually a pretty fun tale. The tricked out vehicles were a fun idea (and thanks to
Cei-U!'s Teen Titans Index for pointing out that Ding-Dong Daddy is a nod to
Ed "Big-Daddy" Roth), and there was some solid action in this story, even if Ding-Dong tying Robin to a motorcycle and then sending him out on a stunt ramp
or shooting surfboards at Aqualad from the back of a station wagon made a whole lot less sense than just pulling out a gun and shooting.
In all honesty, this issue was a lot of fun. A lot of stupid stupid fun.
Important Details:- The Titans are age-progressed from approximately thirteen years of age to approximately fifteen or sixteen years of age as of this issue.
Department of Aquatic Desperation:Okay, we are clearly shown that this is a land-locked town with only a river running through it:
and we get an aerial view of the place that confirms this:
but, sure enough...
Later in the story, a villain conveniently pushes Aqualad into a barrel full of water that seems to be lying around for no specific reason:
Admittedly, that was pretty cool, but it was still a ridiculous and desperate move on Haney's part.
Department of Whoring Your Friend Out to a Pedophile:...because that happened.
Minor Details:- So anyone offering a decent wage to a high school drop out is likely a villain and deserves investigation by the Teen Titans? For that matter, what exactly was Haney trying to say about poor ol' Ed Roth?
- The Titans never do end up finishing their investigation on teen drop-outs for the Commission on Education. Are we just assuming every drop out in the nation is being caused by Ding-Dong Daddy?
Actually, I found this particular moment moving and insightful:
but such realistic portrayals of the hardships of life are quickly abandoned in favor of a far easier answer that can be carried away in handcuffs by the close.
Plot synopsis: After Batman and Robin fail to catch a tricked out dragster committing crimes in Gotham, the Titans are summoned to Washington by the Commission on Education and asked to investigate the high school drop out phenomenon. After interviewing exactly one student, they decided that auto shop employer Ding-Dong Daddy must be up to something because he pays drop-outs good wages. Sure enough, he's building elaborate cars with which to commit crimes, so it's up to the Titans both to stop him and to convince the teens working for him that he's up to no good.