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Post by The Captain on Mar 28, 2020 11:43:15 GMT -5
Came real close to having to take the keys for both of my parents' cars this morning. As I was dropping off their weekly grocery order, my dad asked if I would be coming by tomorrow (Sunday) and when I said I was not, he followed with "well, how am I going to get my Sunday newspaper?"
I told him he might have to go a week without it, and he got all pouty and said "well, this is all a bunch of bullsh$t anyway. No reason we should be stuck in the house. There's only 188 cases in our county, out of 1.8MM people. How much danger am I in going to the gas station to buy a paper?"
I tried to explain to him that the number of cases wasn't an accurate count, because some folks are asymptomatic and because there aren't enough test kits since a certain someone sat around for two months not taking this seriously. He of course got offended at that (he's a Fox devotee) and said that once Trump relaxes the restrictions, he'll go wherever he wants, to which I had to remind him of states' rights and that the governor of PA (Tom Wolf, a Democrat), is not likely to follow what Trump says and will keep the restrictions he put in place much longer. He grunted and shut down, at which point I politely excused myself from their company and headed home.
They're both in their mid-70s, both with underlying health issues (he's a diabetic with high blood pressure, may have had cancer but I'm not sure since he and my mom are tight-lipped about their health, and an alcoholic, while she has been dealing with whatever happened with her brain three months ago), and he's acting like getting a muffin-fluffing Sunday newspaper, so he can do the muffin-fluffing crossword puzzle, is important enough to risk both their lives.
It's not a lie when they say that as your parents get older, they take on the role of the child and you the role of the parent, and it's all being made worse by the Coronapocalypse.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 28, 2020 13:34:46 GMT -5
The Captain I don't know if your dad's newspaper does it, or what his comfort level with tech is at his age, but our local paper provides digital access to the daily (an Sunday) papers if you have a subscription (and they offer Sunday only subscriptions). You get physical delivery (when not in lockdown) and digital copies you can access via device or computer. It might be a way to mollify your father and take away an excuse to go out. -M
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Post by The Captain on Mar 28, 2020 14:25:42 GMT -5
The Captain I don't know if your dad's newspaper does it, or what his comfort level with tech is at his age, but our local paper provides digital access to the daily (an Sunday) papers if you have a subscription (and they offer Sunday only subscriptions). You get physical delivery (when not in lockdown) and digital copies you can access via device or computer. It might be a way to mollify your father and take away an excuse to go out. -M Thanks, but he's not interested in reading it online at all. I suggested that and was told it has to be a physical copy. They have one desktop computer in the house and he doesn't want to sit in front of it for an hour to read the news. |
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Post by Duragizer on Mar 28, 2020 15:01:42 GMT -5
Visited the oldest, smallest supermarket in town not too long ago. Unlike the far larger stores in the area, they actually have paper towels/toilet paper for sale.
Funny how that works out.
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Post by Batflunkie on Mar 28, 2020 15:21:27 GMT -5
One thing I'm noticing while getting back into writing is how much anxiety I feel. Like am I doing a good enough job telling the story as it should be told? Because when I'm in that sort of "out of body experience" state, I write at a heightened emotional level and I guess that comes from penning mushy romance stories on Deviant art. IDK, it's just kind of embarrassing
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Post by Deleted on Mar 28, 2020 15:50:11 GMT -5
One thing I'm noticing while getting back into writing is how much anxiety I feel. Like am I doing a good enough job telling the story as it should be told? Because when I'm in that sort of "out of body experience" state, I write at a heightened emotional level and I guess that comes from penning mushy romance stories on Deviant art. IDK, it's just kind of embarrassing One of the hardest things to learn as a writer is not to worry about if it's good enough, especially when you are doing an initial draft. A lot of the ability to do this stems form accepting that the first draft will not be the final draft, and getting it down on paper the first time is just the start of the process, not the end. A lot of the pressure/anxiety comes from the fallacy that writing is a one-step process and what you write that first time is what the final product is going to look like. It's why I eventually went back to doing my first drafts with pen and paper so I knew there was at least going to be another step to get it into final form (more like 10 or 12 steps), but internalizing the idea that the first draft is not the final draft comes hard to a lot of people. A lot of it stems from the the reality one of my editors pointed out to me when I was freelancing-there's a lot of people out there who want to have written, but very few out there willing to put in the work beyond the first draft to actually be writers. So go ahead and do that initial draft in a heightened emotional level, just accept that you will then have to go back in a more coldly clinical state of mind to edit and revise later. Get your draft down, then go back and make the determination which parts are good enough and which are not and then focus on making what you put down work the way it should. The ideas are already on paper then, but the craft of writing is shaping those ideas into their final form. No one's first draft is good enough. There are no exceptions to that. Repeating for emphasis-there are no exceptions to this! Accepting that is one of the biggest obstacles to becoming a writer and separates writers from dilettantes in many cases. -M |
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Post by Deleted on Mar 28, 2020 16:18:05 GMT -5
I really miss my parents. Sure I can talk to them on the phone. I am grateful the assisted living facility took things seriously very quickly and stopped visitors. I want them to be safe but I can't help feeling cheated out of time I could be spending with them in their final years. All of us have different ways this pandemic has messed with us personally.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 28, 2020 16:47:33 GMT -5
The Captain I don't know if your dad's newspaper does it, or what his comfort level with tech is at his age, but our local paper provides digital access to the daily (an Sunday) papers if you have a subscription (and they offer Sunday only subscriptions). You get physical delivery (when not in lockdown) and digital copies you can access via device or computer. It might be a way to mollify your father and take away an excuse to go out. -M Thanks, but he's not interested in reading it online at all. I suggested that and was told it has to be a physical copy. They have one desktop computer in the house and he doesn't want to sit in front of it for an hour to read the news. EXACTLY the same with my Dad. (pretty much everything you noted is the same with my Dad, tho he prefers OAN rather than Fox.. but he's ignoring the Houston stay in place orders, and is still going out daily).
will *not* read his Wall Street Journal digitally (and won't subscribe, because it's too expensive), so he goes every day up to the community clubhouse - and is FURIOUS that it's closed down by City Order (of course).
so as I said to my Brother - we can't stop him (I'm in a separate city anyways), and he won't listen to us anyways - part of it is Dementia (which he insists he doesn't have) and a lot of it is him being an old, stubborn, ass (and a hardcore Trump supporter)
So he'll keep going out, he'll probably get infected, and then none of us can help him out at all (nope - not open to the possibility of bringing anything home to my immuno-compromised Spouse - same with my Brother and his Wife).
But if he gets it and dies? oh well, problem solved.
sorry to be so callous, but I'm way over dealing with him at this point.
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Post by The Captain on Mar 28, 2020 17:47:56 GMT -5
Visited the oldest, smallest supermarket in town not too long ago. Unlike the far larger stores in the area, they actually have paper towels/toilet paper for sale. Funny how that works out. I did the same thing for my parents this morning. Went to the little grocery out in the middle of nowhere near us instead of the big one in the suburb near them. Found everything on their list save one bag of coleslaw mix (which I did find later at the store near them, as my dad called me with "just a couple more things", including a prescription, between me finishing up my initial trip and running those groceries over to their place). |
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Post by Deleted on Mar 28, 2020 21:53:08 GMT -5
starting to block and unfriend folks on my Facebook.
I don't care if you're a Trump supporter or not (I'm not), I just don't want any defense of him on *my* feed. I don't post negative things on your wall when you praise him.
BUT
if you post (or repost) anything about the Coronavirus being a "hoax" and talk about how the flu kills more each year, and hospitals aren't overwhelmed by that, so there is no need to shut anything down? And it's just a hoax to hurt Trump?
GONE. . don't need people that stupid on my friends list.
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Post by beccabear67 on Mar 28, 2020 21:53:15 GMT -5
My Dad is the looser cannon here now where my Mom was the one butting heads earlier. It is sooo hard to get through sometimes. A lot of people young and old are like this though, the "I know, I know" thing. I guess you could ask them "what do you know" and see if they have even listened.  I told my Dad today, each day the odds get worse for you. Every time you go out, each space you are in outside the house you are in possible danger, and you put Mom in danger too. Let me go do whatever, I am youngest and with the best lungs. I am eating my dins and suddenly see Dad is gone... he had to go get something and must've made sure I was distracted to quietly scarper off! I still held the doors open for him when he got back and made his scrub his hands immediately (with the tap running so he didn't touch the handle). Still... grrr!  |
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Post by Icctrombone on Mar 29, 2020 8:14:10 GMT -5
This meme never gets old  |
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Post by Roquefort Raider on Mar 29, 2020 8:50:28 GMT -5
Warning: grumpy old man alert!
Apparently, the theme in today’s Sunday paper was “things will never be the same after this epidemic and as a society we will all become better because of it”.
While I appreciate and even envy the optimism that prompts people to think so, I call b#####t on the sentiment. Because of what history tells us.
After WWII, we said “never again”. And we continued killing each other over territorial, ideological, ethnic or economic issues, even risking nuclear armageddon on a few occasions. After the Holocaust, we said “never again”. And we witnessed more genocides against the Tutsis in Rwanda, the Yazidis in the Middle-East, or anyone whom the Khmers rouges felt like killing in Cambodia. To name but a few.
After the financial collapse in 2009, brought about by unchecked greed and deregulation, we said “never again”... again. And in less than a decade, we had hamstrung most of the measures implemented to prevent a new crisis, because they interfered with greed.
We will absolutely reach the end of the tunnel, and the covid-19 crisis will be remembered as an unpleasant period, yes. But I bet twenty bucks that we’ll go back to doing exactly what we were doing before, with no particularly enhanced sense of community.
The “before and after” eras, as far as the coronavirus goes, will be as significant as the before and after eras of New Coke, Mullets, Superman Blue/Superman Red or the election of the first black president: we will not observe a whole lot of change.
The positive aspects I do see are that in a time of crisis, we get to see what people are really about. Leaders who rise to the challenge with grace and competence will be recognized. Selfless people helping their neighbours in a time of need will have a chance to shine. And as societies, we will have had a dry run for the next crisis, which might be much worse; I am pleasantly surprised by the discipline shown by most everyone. That’s all for the good.
But a true paradigm change as far as society goes? Not a chance. Too much inertia in human behaviour. Real change happens in little increments, not with any kind if sudden wake-up call.
[/grumpyoldman]
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Post by rberman on Mar 29, 2020 10:03:05 GMT -5
I would love to see the world united to tell China, "Close the wet markets before this happens a third time."
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Post by Batflunkie on Mar 29, 2020 11:01:25 GMT -5
starting to block and unfriend folks on my Facebook. I don't care if you're a Trump supporter or not (I'm not), I just don't want any defense of him on *my* feed. I don't post negative things on your wall when you praise him. BUT if you post (or repost) anything about the Coronavirus being a "hoax" and talk about how the flu kills more each year, and hospitals aren't overwhelmed by that, so there is no need to shut anything down? And it's just a hoax to hurt Trump? GONE. . don't need people that stupid on my friends list. Yes because people dying is clearly a hoax. Makes about as much sense as the people who think that the Sandy Hook shooting was staged as an act to force gun control |
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