For Americans....

A truck is called a lorry....

tire is spelled with a Y....

color is spelled with a U added....

a trunk is a boot......

an elevator is a lift....

suspenders are called braces....

garter belts are called suspenders/suspender belts (mixing the American and British suspenders can get really confusing)

and ptomaine poisoning is called steak & kidney pie.  

I've also heard that UK wrestlers, instead of carny, spoke a kind of rhyming slang, traditionally.

The words of NXT wrestler Joe Coffey, on Meltzer’s star ratings:



Source: itrwrestling.com/news/wwe-nxt-star-blasts-dave-meltzer-he-doesnt-have-a-fking-clue/

I am REALLY pissed off with wrestlers who say that (Kevin Nash is another one, as is Al Snow). I don’t think ANY of those who say it should EVER complain again about airport issues. I mean, they’ve never worked in baggage handling or on the aeroplane, what do they know?

Can no-one EVER complain about a film if they’ve not produced, directed or starred in a movie?

Imagine if a US president said, “I have no time for complaints, none of those journalists have ever worked in the federal government.”

Am I supposed to not have a view on the cold, poorly cooked steak because I’ve never been a pub chef? Imagine if the chef criticised food journalists with, “Well, he’s never cooked a meal in a pub, and he never will, so his opinion is meaningless.”

I trust Coffey, Snow and Nash NEVER complain about music they listen to. I hope not. After all, they’ve never been in a recording studio.

We can pick apart Dave’s star ratings, but it is pathetic to claim he shouldn’t have a view because he’s never been in a ring or booked a show. Well, guess what, geniuses, yours truly has never brewed beer or worked in a pub, but I have a right to complain if a beer tastes bad.

I recently watched Survivor Series 1994.

Vince McMahon and Gorilla Monsoon on commentary. Live from San Antonio, Texas!

I hate gimmick matches and this PPV has no less than 3 of them (mixed tag team with midgets, casket match, and submission only match where the corner man has to throw in the towel to end the match). Oh brother.


First Match is the Bad Guys (Razor Ramon, British Bulldog, 1-2-3 Kid, and the New Headshrinkers Fatu and Sione/Barbarian) vs. the Teamsters (Shawn Michaels, Diesel, Owen Hart, Jim Neidhardt, Jeff Jarrett)

Nice to see some team names. If I didn’t know better, based on the names, I’d assume that the Bad Guys were the heels and the Teamsters the faces. I suspect that Vince McMahon doesn’t like unions. Who’s have guessed?

The Teamsters all come out to Diesel’s music (so no Shawn’s music) and the Bad Guys all come out to Razor’s music.

This was a great match…until Diesel came in and eliminated 4 guys in probably less than 2 minutes…then it got worse…much worse. Razor is left and we have some good action between Razor and Diesel, then Diesel takes control and finally jackknives Razor. Shawn (who hasn’t been in the match yet) asks to tag in to make the pin. So Diesel tags him. Then Shawn asks Diesel to come back in and hold up Razor for him. Razor reluctantly agrees. Shawn gets ready for his superkick (not yet Sweet Chin Music) and…can you see where this is going? Razor moves and Shawn kicks Diesel instead. I saw that coming a MILE away. Diesel is of course p!ssed, especially as this is the third time in the past two or three months that Shawn has accidentally superkicked Diesel. Those two get into it and go outside the ring and Diesel chases Shawn into the back room and the rest of the team, like a bunch of morons, follow them out so that the entire team gets counted out and Razor wins. He is the sol survivor. This went from a 4 star match to a 1 star match in short order. Wow. Really dumb finish. I know they’re setting up the Michael-Diesel split and Diesel’s face turn, but they didn’t have to do it like this. There was a lot of talent in the ring, but the last few minutes of the match really wasted it. And this was probably the match I was looking forward to most, as I don’t like the stipulations in the Hart-Backlund match.


Next match is Clowns Are Us (Doink, Dink, Wink, and Pink) vs. the Royal Family (Jerry Lawler, Queasy, Sleazy, and Cheesy).

Ugh. I hate stuff like this. I seriously considered fast forwarding past this match. Dink was bad enough, then the WWF had to add 5 more little people to the mix. Didn’t we have enough of this with the King Kong Bundy thing at that Wrestlemania back in the 80’s? I know Vince wants to make it family friendly, but come one.  Anyway, the big people aren’t allowed in at the same time as the little people. We’ll see how that goes.

Anyway, I’m sorry, but this match was terrible. A bunch of bad comedy. I finally broke down and started fast forwarding. Oh, Lawler’s team won, in case anybody cares. Except McMahon.


Next is for the WWF Championship: Bret Hart (champ) w. Davey Boy Smith vs. Bob Backlund w. Owen Hart.

Once again, Bret Hart, as WWF champ, is not the main event, but the midcard. WTF?

At first they said that this was a submission only match. I didn’t like that, but I figured it might not be too bad. Then they added the stipulation that each guy has a corner man, and the match only ends when that corner man throws in the towel. If the actually wrestler actually submits (or does not submit) it doesn’t count. It’s only up to the corner man. That is…stupid. Really. Stupid. Does everything have to be a gimmick with McMahon?

Bob Backlund eventually wins this slogfest with his cross face ciecken wing as Bret’s mom Helen (with Davey Boy knocked unconscious) takes the towel from Stu and throws it in.

I know this match has gotten generally good reviews, but personally I thought it was boring. Lots of headlocks, so if you like those, you’re in luck. I think the stupid stipulation ruined what could have been a decent match. This match also went way too long at over 35 minutes. The segment at the end with Bret in the cross face chicken wing lasted way too long I think it must have been over 10 minutes. At least Owen did a good job selling his remorse and sympathy for Bret before we find out, after the match, that it was all a setup.

Another dumb thing about this match. It’s submissions only, and the corner man has to throw in the towel to end the match. So that means there must be no DQ’s. So why is the ref breaking the holds when somebody reaches the ropes? And why are the wrestlers complying? Just another thing about this PPV that makes no sense.

At one point, Bret tried to pin “Mr. Backlund” Uh, this is a submission match, Bret. Also, they kept mentioning how George Foreman, who was 45 years old, recently won the boxing world championship, and that Bob Backlund is the same age.

Apparently they had one of those phone voting things where people who like to throw away their money call a 900 number and vote for whether they think the chicken wing or the sharpshooter is the more devastating hold. Surprisingly, 79% of callers voted for the chicken wing. I agree with that, though I’m surprised that that many voted for it. Sharpshooter is a way cooler name, though.


Next match is the Million Dollar Team (Tatanka, Bam Bam Bigelow, King Kong Bundy, and the Heavenly Bodies) w. Ted DiBiase and Jim Cornette vs. Guts-n-Glory (Lex Luger, Mabel, Adam Bomb, and the Smoking Gunns)

You’ve got a lukewarm feud here with Luger vs. Tatanka, and not much else, though I guess the Heavenly Bodies and Smoking Gunns have something where Jim Cornette destroyed their cowboy hats so later on the Gunns destroyed the Bodies’ stupid angel wings. I think the Bodies came out ahead in that exchange, since the Gunns actually did them a favor.

Anyway, I thought the first half of this match was great, but the second half slowed down a lot. I see that Tatanka and the Heavenly Bodies have new ring gear. I don’t know if this is just for this PPV or permanent changes. Not bad though I prefer the old tights in both cases.

First elimination has Mabel coming off the top rope to squash Pritchard, and while it looked kinda cool and high impact, it did make Pritchard look pretty dumb to stand there and wait for Mabel to jump on top of him. There was also a cool spot where both Mabel and Bigelow went over the top rope.

We get a “USA” chant for Lex in spite of the fact that all of his opponents are American. I hate stupidity like this. I do like one moment where Bundy knocks Luger down then yells “USA!”.

At the end, it’s just Luger against 3 – Tatanka, Bundy, and Bigelow. Luger pins Tatanka, but as he lies there in exhaustion Bundy immediately comes in and splashes him for the pin and the win. While that finish made sense, it was also anticlimactic. The match took about 23 minutes.


They interview crazy Mr. Bob Backlund after his title win and he again mentions how he considers himself champ since 1978 since he never gave up to thE Iron Sheik (his manager threw in the towel but he never submitted himself) and Gorilla makes a good point that Backlund now got the title in the exact same manner that he claims he never should have lost the title in – with someone else giving up for him. Don’t try to bring logic into pro wrestling, Gorilla!


Finally we get the main event, the Undertaker (w. Paul Bearer) vs. Yokozuna (w. Mr Fuji and Jim Cornette) in a casket match.

I have no idea why this is the main event. Chuck Norris is the special “troubleshooting” referee to make sure there’s no outside interference like there was at Royal Rumble.

It takes about 10 minutes to get these two guy in the ring as they both have very long entrances. They really don’t explain the casket rules very well here but apparently there are no pins. Just get your guy in the casket and close the lid for the win. Vince contradicts himself at one point, as he implies that the two refs will close the lid, then later says that the wrestler has to be the one to close the lid.

Chuck Norris stares down Bam Bam and Bundy, then kicks down Jarrettt to prevent interference. However, IRS (who hasn’t participated in this PPV) sneaks in from behind and knocks Taker around then puts the sleeper on and tosses him in the casket. Yoko is lying more or less unconscious but eventually wakes up and is about to close the lid on Taker but Taker wakes up and prevents it just in time, and eventually gets Yoko in the casket for the win! Match took about 15 minutes Before closing the lid, he takes the Japanese flag from Fuji, breaks the flag pole over his knee, and tosses it in the casket. Because it’s okay to desecrate the Japanese flag, kids.
This match was better than I expected, but still, certainly not a 5 star classic.


All in all, a very mediocre PPV. My favorite match (the opener) was marred by a stupid ending. One other survivor match was decent and one was dreadful, I didn’t much care for the Hart-Backlund match, the main event was better than I expected, but still not that great.

The Bret/Backlund match to watch is the Superstars bout where Bob turns heel. 

I'll be the hipster and say this handheld has a pretty great Bret vs Bob match on it, @ 30:15



This was a year before the heel turn, and the night before the first King of the Ring PPV where Hart of course wrestled 3 times, including a classic vs Mr Perfect

As I continue to revisit my old tapes, WrestleFest ‘92 was last night’s viewing:






We begin with Virgil, wearing a protective face mask, against Shawn Michaels. I’ve completely forgotten the kayfabe reason for the mask. Did Repo Man or Nailz harm Virgil’s face? Or was it Sid Justice? The Nasty Boys? What happened eludes my memory. Anyway, this is a solid bout with both men firing on all cylinders, presented in a believable way. It takes place in MSG, which always adds to the atmosphere. Michaels wins via pinfall.

Money Inc. defend their tag titles against The Bushwhackers. It was short and fun. I was kind of rooting for Luke and Butch to win this one, but IRS pinned Butch. What, two conclusive and consecutive pinfall victories on a Coliseum release?

Make that three as Davey Boy Smith pins The Model Rick Martel. It felt like both were capable of better here, but it was hardly long enough to gain any momentum.

Then we got our fourth consecutive pinfall victory as Bret Hart, defending the IC championship, defeats Barbarian. It was a good big man vs. small man encounter with a real air of credibility (Barbarian’s psychology and timing was underrated).

(In between matches, Bobby Heenan and Gene Okerlund have fun playing tennis. Typical Coliseum segments, short and fun)

The Natural Disasters take on The Nasty Boys. It’s hardly a classic, but it’s enhanced by the fact both teams were former proteges, so there’s some intrigue. And we get our fifth consecutive clean win as Earthquake pins Sags. Wow. You’re losing your touch, Coliseum, we’d been conditioned to expect DQs and count outs…

Make that consecutive/conclusive ending number six as Macho Man pins IRS in an okay match, one which was chosen by a fan (allegedly).

In a segment which defies belief, but made me smile, The Berzerker showed us how to host the perfect party; invitations are easy as he just grabs a person and forces them to attend his party. We also get to see him make peanut butter sandwiches. You had to see this to believe it.

We get our first and only DQ ending of the tape as Repo Man is disqualified during a bout with El Matador, a pretty forgettable bout, to be honest.

But we return to conclusive endings as the Legion of Doom and Natural Disasters take on the Money Inc. and the Nasty Boys. It’s intriguing to see the LOD and Disasters on the same team as they were enemies a short while before this match. Wrestling is filled with forgiving souls, where Jake’s pet snake can be killed by Earthquake, yet they’re cutting promos months later. Anyway, this was only a passable bout. Quake pins Saggs for the win.

Virgil/Shawn and Bushwhackers/Money Inc. are good bouts. Bret/Barbarian is the match of the tape. You can take or leave the rest.