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Post by dbutler69 on Feb 15, 2020 9:31:32 GMT -5
Rules of being a 90's superhero.
1. Carry a gun...a big gun. Two guns is even better. Bonus points if the weaponry is grafted into your body.
2. Instead of spandex, wear a jacket. One with lots of pockets. Leather preferred but a trench-coat is cool too.
3. Have a superhero name made up of shoving two words together, preferably violent words - e.g., shatterfist, bloodkill, etc.
4. Strike random poses that would look good on a poster or a calendar for no particular reason, even if you're having a deep conversation at the time.
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Post by wildfire2099 on Feb 15, 2020 9:32:44 GMT -5
Rules of being a 90's superhero.1. Carry a gun...a big gun. Two guns is even better. Bonus points if the weaponry is grafted into your body. 2. Instead of spandex, wear a jacket. One with lots of pockets. Leather preferred but a trench-coat is cool too. 3. Have a superhero name made up of shoving two words together, preferably violent words - e.g., shatterfist, bloodkill, etc. 4. Strike random poses that would look good on a poster or a calendar for no particular reason, even if you're having a deep conversation at the time. ... and pouches. you must have lots and lots of pouches for.... things. |
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The Captain
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Post by The Captain on Feb 15, 2020 9:50:08 GMT -5
Rules of being a 90's superhero.1. Carry a gun...a big gun. Two guns is even better. Bonus points if the weaponry is grafted into your body. 2. Instead of spandex, wear a jacket. One with lots of pockets. Leather preferred but a trench-coat is cool too. 3. Have a superhero name made up of shoving two words together, preferably violent words - e.g., shatterfist, bloodkill, etc. 4. Strike random poses that would look good on a poster or a calendar for no particular reason, even if you're having a deep conversation at the time. ... and pouches. you must have lots and lots of pouches for.... things. And if you're a 90's female superhero, go for the biggest breast implants possible. GGG or larger is preferable, and they have to be perfectly circular, like two cantaloupes stapled to your chest, because that is how breasts, even with implants, look in the real world. Also, don't forget to use the least amount of material possible to cover them. No bra needed, just a couple of thin strips of cloth, usually in an "X" pattern across your chest, should suffice to keep them in place while you are performing all of your acrobatic and fighting maneuvers. |
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Post by nerdygirl905 on Feb 15, 2020 13:23:21 GMT -5
If you are in the Silver Age instead, remember to get a love interest that fights rather badass but gets kidnapped often and a love interest that is not that badass and gets kidnapped even more often.
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Post by Icctrombone on Feb 15, 2020 13:51:29 GMT -5
You must have a evil twin that assumes your identity. Extra points if he’s from a parallel dimension.
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Post by Icctrombone on Feb 15, 2020 13:53:01 GMT -5
All of your supporting cast must eventually gain superpowers and fight crime for a short amount of time.
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The Captain
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Post by The Captain on Feb 17, 2020 10:41:44 GMT -5
All of your supporting cast must eventually gain superpowers and fight crime for a short amount of time. And one of them turns on you, becoming a villain for a while, until you turn them back through the power of "love and friendship". |
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Post by Roquefort Raider on Feb 17, 2020 11:49:59 GMT -5
That quiet and plain-looking character who plays some minor support role in your life? Just give it time... They will turn into a love interest eventually, and will suddenly change into centerfold material!
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Post by pinkfloydsound17 on Feb 17, 2020 12:48:57 GMT -5
At some point, you make use of a vehicle that in no way helps you but maybe it makes you look cool. Heavy on the maybe.
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Post by Prince Hal on Feb 17, 2020 14:44:52 GMT -5
At some point, you make use of a vehicle that in no way helps you but maybe it makes you look cool. Heavy on the maybe. And melds your superhero name with the suffix "-mobile" or "-plane." |
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Post by nerdygirl905 on Mar 14, 2020 14:43:56 GMT -5
If you are an Archer-type, carry lots of Trick Arrows. Yes, even the Nuclear Warhead Arrow, just in case.
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Post by codystarbuck on Mar 14, 2020 22:49:18 GMT -5
If your superhero gimmick involves firearms, don't bother carrying extra ammo; your weapons will have an endless supply.
Large objects (vehicles, ships, mountains, buildings, etc...) will not collapse under their own weight when you lift them or try to prop them up.
Getting fuel to your secret lair, for your superhero vehicle never involves revealing your secret identity or leaving a paper trail.
Super powers automatically endow you with sewing and tailoring skills.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 28, 2020 2:04:56 GMT -5
- If your name is Dick, a female character is going to call your name a lot and say she needs you
- Never age, even if you've been around 60-80 years and the rest of the world does
- It doesn't matter if your opponent is destroying your world, low blows are verboten
- There's always another you in another universe especially if your books sell, and you'll meet to sell some more
- If you break your girlfriend's neck by whiplash, blame it on the green guy
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Post by wildfire2099 on Mar 28, 2020 10:07:42 GMT -5
Feel free to specialize in one field, once you're a 'scientist' you will immediately be a foremost expert on any topic needed, as well as a top notch engineer and architect.
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Post by dbutler69 on Jun 13, 2020 12:56:12 GMT -5
Feel sorry for yourself or doubt yourself constantly and/or blame yourself for things that aren't your fault.
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