GI Joe #45Gee, camouflage and arrows, in a jungle environment..........I wonder where they got that idea?
Creative Team: Larry Hama-words, Rod Whigham & Andy Mushynsky-deeds, Joe Rosen-text, George Roussos-hues, Denny O'Neil-kibbitzing, Jim Shooter-grousing
Synopsis: Ace and Ripcord are conducting a recon flight, in a Skystriker, instead of using a better platform, like a U-2 or SR-71, with better equipment. Cobra sees them, but Zartan stops Prof Appel from taking action, so long as they don't threaten, as the JOEs could use it as a provocation to action.
Awfully sound thinking, for this bunch.
Meanwhile, Hawk visits General Austin, in the hospital (says US Army Medical Center but Walter Reed would be more appropriate...or the Bethesda Naval Hospital) and updates him on the situation. They are interrupted by The Rock, who cuts a promo and a Hospital Ward Death Match ensues.
Whoops, wrong Austin.
Meanwhile, at the base PX canteen, Stalker introduces Snake Eyes and Spirit Iron Knife (or is it Joe Scarpa?) to knew JOEs Quick-Kick (Akira Maeda?) and Alpine (can't wait to see him use his horn, in battle, against Cobra)....
One of the support personnel mentions a radio intercept from the police band, or a message for the team, with three Morse Code Us, followed by the words "The Hard Master's killer is....." and Snake Eyes snatches it out of his hands and reads it, then runs off.
Back in the Gulf of Mexico, Ripcord secures his oxygen mask, which he wasn't wearing before, checks that Ace's pressure suit is okay, then hits the ejection lever and bails out over Cobra Island and does a HALO (High Altitude, Low Opening) jump to shore....
Hawk informs General Austin, who thinks Hawk set this up, but Hawk reveals that it wasn't exactly the plan; but, it gives him an excuse to launch a covert insertion to get him back, which he then scrambles.
Cobra spots Ripcord on radar and Zartan goes to deal with it.
Snake Eyes turns up at Storm Shadows little hidey hole, in a water tower, and shows him the message. The three MOrse Us create the I Ching hexagram symbol of their ninja clan and they tease us with the killer's identity, but drag it out, like a stripper.
Ripcord lands and moves towards Cobra's base, carrying what appears to be a Belgian FN-FAL battle rifle....
..which isn't exactly something you could easily stow in a fighter cockpit, let alone jump with, by ejecting from said cockpit, instead of out of a cargo plane.
Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow take jetpacks from SS's lair....
...and fly them to a Cobra warehouse, where the Baroness has a Rattler stored, for her personal use. The warehouse is another Arbco front, which makes me wonder why all of their buildings and businesses haven't been raided by the FBI, since the JOEs know it is a Cobra front....as does every 5 year old who can unscramble words of two syllables or less.
Zartan goes after Ripcord, with a high tech compound bow, right after Storm Shadow remarks about someone skilled enough to steal one of his arrows and fire it into the Hard Master's house and kill him, without being seen.
Hmmmmmmmmm.......
Zartan and Ripcord play cat and mouse with long range rifle (it's a .308 caliber, same as the M-14, which is the basis for the M-21 Sniper Rifle) and both are excellent shots. Zartan goes camo mode and tries to sneak up on Ripcord, but he is pretty crafty, himself.
Storm Shadow finally confirms what they had been hinting at, for pages, that Zartan was the one who killed the Hard Master.
Ripcord and Zartan fight hand to hand, and the last page suggests Ripcord wins, until you read the dialogue....
Oh....and Hawk gets promoted to General and is given overall command of GI JOE.
Thoughts: Somebody sat through Rambo: First Blood Part 2 (remember when they emphasized the First Blood part and not the Rambo part, in marketing?) about a dozen times, between high tech compound boys, sneaky camo attacks, and big honking knives that are not military issue........
Zartan even has the long hair. All that is missing is the unintelligible mumbling.
Aaabsalootleh!
I checked and the Ripcord toy is depicted with an FAL rifle, probably because it looked exotic, to the designers. The US military never used it, though the later Squad Automatic Weapon was from Fabrique Nationale (FN), the same manufacturer, though in the same 5.56 mm caliber as the M-16A2 rifle. The FAL fired a 7.62 mm round (.308 caliber), which was the European standard, at the dawn of the 80s, before the US forced all of the other NATO nations to adopt the 5.56 with NATO standardization, as well as the capability to use M-16 magazines. The US didn't have to change a thing and all of the rest of NATO had to buy all new weapons.
Mike Zecks cover looks more like Ripcord is carrying the German HK-33 5.56 mm variant of their earlier 7.62 mm G-3 battle rifle.
If you are wondering what the big deal is, the NATO 7.62 mm round had a longer range and a heavier punch, more akin to the .30-06 round of the American M-1 Garand, in WW2, and the German 7.92 Mauser round, used by the Wehrmacht. They US used the 7.62 mm, when it adopted the M-14 and carried that into Vietnam; but, found that the M-14 was heavy and cumbersome in such environments, as well as in urban combat and initiated the research that led to the adoption of the M-16, with plastic buttstock and barrel grips, to reduce weight. It also came with the lighter 5.56 mm round, which meant more ammo could be carried, though it fired at a reduced effective range. The compensation was supposed to be that the bullet was designed to tumble and hit a target with greater shock power; but, in Vietnam, this proved false (mainly due to the ammo used in the field, vs testing). The SAS liked the M-16 for jungle fighting and used it, instead of the British Army issue L1A1 Self Loading Rifle, which was their designation for the FAL weapon.
We did give up the .45 cal M1911A1 pistol for the 9mm Beretta, which became the M9 pistol, in the US Army. So, we weren't complete bullies about it.
Leaving all that tech stuff behind, what we have is the answer to the running subplot as to who killed the Hard Master. What remains to be answered is why? It also begs the question how Hama is going to resolve it, since he can't kill Zartan, Storm Shadow or Snake Eyes, because of the cartoon (and toy sales). So, until Hama introduces a character named Cannon Fodder or Red Shirt, don't expect anyone to die. Well, Dr Appel, because they have other Crimson Guard.
Hawk getting promoted was hardly a surprise, especially after he was pulled from the field and Duke was inserted as field commander. Except he is outranked by both Wild Bill and Flint, who are warant officers.
Funny how Hawk is the only commissioned officer introduced in the toyline and other media. So, does the anti-officer prejudice come from Hama or Hasbro? Either way, as a former commissioned officer, I demand that they be cancelled, as is the modern way! Barring that, I demand they be assigned to KP, for the duration!
Aside from that, I have questions: where does Cobra get the materials to manufacture their weapons? Or, where are they manufactured and purchased? How can the JOEs not trace that infrastructure? How can they maintain an economy on Cobra island, with no apparent resources? The island shouldn't even have a fresh water supply, which means they have to have a desalinization plant...and a big one. Why did the US government cave instead of blockading the island? This is the Reagan Administration; if they can trump up a war with Grenada, they will blockade an island that pops up out of the Gulf of Mexico, off the US coast! Why hasn't the government initiated the seizure of all Arbco assets? Why haven't they banned the sale of throat lozenges to Cobra Island, focing Cobra Commander to seek them elsewhere? I mean, he must go through bagfuls, with all of that screeching!
For the wrestling impaired:
Joe Scarpa was a pro wrestler who spent the latter part of his career wrestling as Chief Jay Strongbow, in the WWF and became a road agent for them, when he retired (running house shows and reporting back gate numbers and reports about the show to the Titan Sports offices and Vince McMahon) he was Italian, with no Native American heritage, much liked Iron Eyes Cody, from the littering PSAs.
The Rock is, of course, Dwayne Johnson, steroided wrestler and action movie hero (and alleged bottle urinator on set), who often faced Stone Cold Steve Austin in matches, in the Attitude Era of the later 90s and early 2000s, which would make General Austim a hell of a lot more interesting. Gimme a Hell Yeah!
The WWF actually did an angle where Austin attacked Vince McMahon, in a hospital room, after he was injured. They were going to do an angle where he blows up the Debbie Reynolds tTheater and Casino, in Las Vegas, after the WWF bought the property and was going to put up a WWF-themed facility; but, it was going to be too complicated to do, safely. didn't stop them from dropping Owen Hart from the roof of Kemper Arena, in Kansas City.
Akira Maeda is a former Japanese pro wrestler and martial artist who wrestled, for a time, in the UK as Kwik-Kik Lee. And, yes, the JOE toy is an Asian martial artist, in ridiculous costume, which is impractical for combat. Maeda was known t be a Rick, with a silent P (copyright Vyvyan, of the Young Ones), who liked to sucker punch/kick people, because he thought he was a badass. He did it to Satoru Sayama, the original Tiger Mask, in the UWF promotion, while they were having issues behind the scenes over the direction of the promotion, as well as to New Japan wrestler Ricki Chosu, when he threw a hard kick to his face and broke his occipital bone and was fired, permanently, from New Japan Pro Wrestling. He also had an infamous match with Andre the Giant, where he did something to PO Andre, who stopped cooperating with him and no-sold everything he did, to the point that Maeda stated throwing hard kicks to get a reaction.
Alpine and Quick-Kick were part of the 1985 release of toys. We still have a few figures who haven't appeared yet, like Keel Haul (CO of the USS Flag), Dusty (desert soldier, who looks nothing like wrestler Dusty Rhodes), Frostbite (snow cat driver), Toll Booth (bridge layer vehicle driver) and Starduster (jet pack...and someone is a Dusty Rhodes fan, because Stardust was one of his nicknames, along with The American Dream. Dusty and Stardust are too coincidental, for my money).