Welcome aboard, Ray!

I found Chris's post pretty touching, and glad it brought you here.

While I've spent my share of time mourning the old site, I'm overwhelmed by how nearly the entire community seamlessly made the move here, and I've never seen the old community this active. It's nearly impossible to stay on top of ALL the discussion

So I think you'll like it here.

I do.

'Course, I'm not biased or anything

CBR has an I Love Ya But You're Strange front page article on the infamous 1951 Batman tale The Joker's Comedy Of Errors from Batman #66. You probably seen or read this story,the one where the word BONER is used a hundred times. Lots of panels are reprinted in the article.
Any bets if someone reproduced these panels or discussed the story in the forums under the new regime would have been given at least a week's ban?

Batfleck revealed:

Thanks Mr. Sinclair !

Hello all. I don't know all of you, but I hope to in the near future. I haven't been with CBR that long. I was starting to really enjoy the Classics section of the forum until the big board wipe about a week and a half back. So I figured I would follow the group that were mostly affiliated with that section of the forum here. So far, I've found this new forum to be very welcoming. Everyone seems very down-to-Earth so to speak. In my experience among forums, that's a rarity. In any event, I've found myself at a strange point in my life, and I'm not sure how to proceed. I normally don't ask for advice online because of all the BS I have to sift through, but I figure I have nothing to lose at the moment. At least in this place. So I'm going to share.

I'm 26. But I feel like I've lived 100 years. Obviously that doesn't make sense, but basically I feel...hmmm..."silently distressed" I guess. I have goals in life, but I have not harnessed the will to accomplish them. I've had help and encouragement for years and years. Yet still no resolve. I've always, always wanted to be a comic book artist. A penciler to be exact. As a child I was always enamoured watching superheroes. Cartoons mostly. I don't know why. I collected some comics when I could and it inspired me to draw. It was probably the only thing I was remotely "good" at as a kid. At least that is what I was told growing up. I wasn't the best academic student. And my grades started to dwindle as I got farther through school, especially high school. I was raised by my mom, and she did the best she could although she had her own problems. My father wasn't really around (typical scenario for a black youth). These days I don't really have a relationship with either of them really. Don't really want one with my father and me and my mother have just been separated too long. This isn't me necessarily blaming mom and dad for who I am today. I believe I realize all of my struggles and problems, and how to solve them. It's just the desire that has not clicked for me. I attended art school for about 7 years part time until I got my BFA degree. I gained skills and knowledge, but to this day they aren't honed. I amassed a decent amount of debt. I did meet my wife, an international student from Hong Kong at the time. Now we're living together in our own place, which is essentially financed by her parents. She has actually done very well for herself with what she has learned in school. She specialized in children's illustration and editorial illustration. As a result of her hard work she's had numerous jobs that have given her the opportunity to showcase her talent to the world, and she's been decently compensated for it. Me? I'm still working on a comic book portfolio. Or rather, still trying to master nuances for sequential art. A lot of my friends from school have gone on and obtained jobs within various fields of the art community since they've graduated. But not me. Due to my inconsistent work ethic I've faltered in my own quest. All I really want to do is work either in the comic industry, storyboard industry, concept design for games, whatever. The thing that is holding me back though is my desire. And it's started to cause marital problems I think as well. After two years of marriage I feel I'm well...a disappointing husband. She doesn't even have a ring on her finger, which I'm trying to save up for. We both decided to get married since my wife was graduating soon and we weren't sure if she would have to go back to Hong Kong if she didn't find a job within a couple of months after graduating. This happens to a lot of international students at the collegiate level unfortunately. We felt that we loved each other enough and would want to be together forever. Since graduation though all I have is part-time job at my local community watching kids. Doesn't exactly pay the bills. My wife is doing the heavy lifting financially. I work on my drawing skills when I'm not working, but it's inconsistent. Or I'll work hard for two weeks and then falter. Same with exercising and losing weight which I'm also doing. I'm not obese, but I just want to start being more healthy. I'm also learning Chinese in my spare time so I can better communicate with my wife's family whenever I go and visit them overseas (which I have a few times). My wife's happiness is important to me. And I want her to be happy. She she wants me to be happy by achieving my "dream". Or at least "fighting for my future" as she put it several times.

I have to say, I would trade...almost anything to have the most profound work ethic that exists. That is something money can't buy. I wish I could just change my ways. Like I implied previously I know what the issue is. I know what needs to be done. Yet I can't do it. Is it fear? Perhaps. I remember someone telling me a while ago that maybe I'm too afraid of failure, that I don't try very hard. So that in the end I can justify not failing since I didn't try in the first place. Some days I literally browse the internet aimlessly for hous afraid to pick up my pencil and practice. I've just had enough of all this taking 1 step forward and 10 steps back. I want to draw for a living. But I can't do that if I don't practice consistently and spend hours at the table. I've heard that it's very hard to break into comics or a lot of related drawing industries, because of various reasons. I feel though if I had the will, I would have been there by now easily. This is all I really know. I don't want to live the rest of my life working in retail or some other kind of service industry. I've been down the road, and while I'm sure it's fine for other people...it just isn't me. And I don't really like dealing with the public in that capacity. My close friends don't necessarily know about my situation. I'm sure they suspect. I haven't showcased too much of my own work online or even in person to those that inquire. I'm willing to bet that a few maybe even think I married my wife because her family is kind of well off in a sense. At this stage what matters to me is how I move forward an stop what has been plaguing me. Sometimes I wonder if it's be easier to be an alcoholic. Or someone with a gambling problem. If the trade off would mean that I still do my best at whatever it is I want to do with my life career-wise. I have two perfectly good hands and they aren't being used to full capacity. Not sure I could look someone who can't or doesn't have hands in the face and say that. I want to believe this is what I want to do because...I've seen the finished product of artists I covet. I want to feel that "high". I know I have to go through hell before I get to heaven, but...yeah...it's not clicking. Sadly. The confidence just isn't there.

Well...as illogical as it seems, this is the most I've shared about my personal life to people I don't even know when I've had the chance to share with people I actually do know first. I'm at a crossroads, and I feel like I'm running out of time in some capacity. The last few years of my life have been quite demoralizing the big picture. I'm anxious to hear your response though. Whether it's what I want to hear or not. I'm all ears.

I just watched An American Werewolf in London. That scene where David first transforms into the werewolf is amazing. Who knew such effects could achieved in 80's cinema?

I rejected you, Dubip. I don't really care to do much with my other account, let alone have any friends.