Post by Batflunkie on Aug 19, 2021 20:37:04 GMT -5
Stupor, The All-American Guy
Chapter 1: Fantastic Results To Follow, Inquire Within
The year is 1964, in a world much like our own, but with small differences.
Jackie Kennedy is the queen of America and technology has advanced to such a point of unfathomable proportions, and yet, almost quaintly, 60's style Americana is still intact.
It's a place like this where a story of such magnitude is just bound to happen
It is here that we find the linebacker for Oakland high, Zachary Stomms inside Mel's Magical Mystery Soda Shop, pouring a perfectly good rootbeer float on top of the head of poor Wendell Sachs. For all intents and purposes, Wendell was a loser who excelled at nothing but being bullied. Grades were average at best, home life was ho-hum, and his personality was something akin to a wet sock.Wendell had few personal aspirations and was content on being a wall flower for the rest of his life. Reading comics, watching tv and film, and listening to radio, these were the boy's few escapes. But enough about a dweeb who will eventually become the sole focus of this literary excursion, here's the rest of the beat-down."How many times I gotta tell yah Sachs?,"Stomms said, basking in the glow of another punk's day ruined," I don't like you, I don't like your face, and I don't like you being in here after school with all my pals. You give this joint an air of unsofistication and ain't no teeny-boppers gonna dance to the jukebox with you in here."
Sachs knew Stomms' price and promptly left the establishment, issue of Scientific Plot-holes in hand, sniffles in nose. The day was filled with song and coarse rain. Wendell trudged through puddles to the nearest news stand to purchase the newest assortment of costume rags. He loved Wild Blue the most, but several new ones had caught his eye. Some best left unmentioned.It was in this issue of Wild Blue in particular that he noticed a curious ad. "Weak willed and pasty?," it read, "submit yourself to the awesome might of Pol Manning's half hour training course and you can glide into a life that you've always dreamed of. Fantastic results to follow, inquire within." The ad then gave an address that was, surprisingly enough, not too far from Wendell's current location.
And so, the young lad walked down three city blocks past fantastic structures both new and lived in only to find the location to be nothing more than a ramshackle shack of dubious origin. Opening the doorway lead into an antique store that was possibly more than it seemed.Finding no one in sight, Wendell run the little bell. From behind the bead curtain emerged an elderly man of perhaps otherworldly descent. "Yes?," the man said, "can I help you?" "Yessir," Wendell took the issue of Wild Blue, flipped through the pages and pointed to the advertisement,"I'm here about this." The man nodded and from behind the counter, he pulled out an oversized comic magazine that seemed impossibly aged.
"I'm sorry? I thought I was getting a work out program?" "Son, this will be the greatest work out program of your pathetic little life! Lesser men have died trying to decode this four-color scripture." Wendell scoffed,"But it's a comic book." The man nodded,"Yes, to the untrained eye, it may seem as such, but inside it's pages, it holds an impossible power to turn mortal men such as yourself in gods for two whole hours if they be worthy enough. If not, well, let's not get into that right now. Too much pressure. Turn to page 14 and read panel 3."Wendell did as he was told and meekly uttered the words, "Shablamzo!". Suddenly, out of nowhere a huge blue bolt of lightning crackled and engulfed Wendell, shocking his muscular structure into something extraordinary. When it was completed, he was a new man. Wendell tried to speak as he glanced at his new form, covered from head to toe in some sort sporadically colored spandex fabric.
The voice was new and altogether different. The results were truly stupefying."Good," said the old man, patting himself on the back, " for too long I have been the silent protector of this world you call Earth. My time and life force are now nearing their end and I needed someone to pass on my lineage for I have no kin. You Wendell Sachs, you will be this world's new champion. I hope your cause will be a righteous one." And with that, the old man vaporized into a pool of thick smoke, leaving Wendell alone and confused. But suddenly he heard a voice. "If council is what you seek Sachs, try and find an old colleague of mine who calls himself Warlon."
Meanwhile, in something at the very least resembling Britain, a lone figure runs across the roof tops hunting it's prey. This was the goal of The Scarlet Dragoon, emissary of Queen Elizabeth X59D, to hunt down and destroy the Chromagnoids; dangerous robotic entities that evolved from regular household appliances. This one, Spooner X-8, was as bad as they came. And it was about to ascend to a higher state of consciousness by merging with the Supreme One known as Voxx; a godlike super computer left over from the last war that guided nuclear missiles.From under her sleeve, the Dragoon pulled out a kinetically charged dagger and threw it with deadly precision at Spooner X-8, critically wounding it. "Kkrrrzzzt! Damn you Dragoon! Only a few moments more and my uplink would have been complete." "Not even being one with a god could save your soul," her ladyship said, pulling out another kinetic dagger," and now on behalf of Elizabeth X59D, I commit you to the great scrapheap in the sky."And with a loud thunk, Spooner X-8's function ceased.
Wiping the sweat from her brow, The Dragoon dialed a secret number to parliament on her wrist-radio, "The mission is completed," she muttered, out of breath. "Good Agent 12, her majesty thanks you for your service. The money has been wired to your account per usual. God bless the queen." "God bless the queen" she parroted before cutting the transmission.She got up from her crouched position beside the hunk of scrap that used to be Spooner X-8 and shouted "Kinetica!!".
Much like with Wendell, a bolt of lightning engulfed her and The Scarlet Dragoon was transformed back into her status as a civilian, Annie Joslen. She was crippled orphan living in the rafters of an old opera house. She finally escaped the hell hole that was Saint Mary's Orphanage for Girls many month prior.
Living on the streets, sleeping in subways, she sold copies of a tabloid newspaper to survive. It was here, amongst the news stands, that she found her saving grace, a girl's mystery comic called Debbie. Every week a new wrinkle would unfold and slowly, Annie would realize that the clues and their locations seemed to mirror her own locale. She soon got an inkling to follow Debbie's lead and what she found was something intriguing to say the least. It was at an old, abandoned opera house that she found her treasure, yet another copy of Debbie. But this one was different.
Inside, Debbie congratulated her and revealed that her prize was that of an extraordinary power to serve the Queen. All she had to do was shout "Kinetica!" and she would become a woman that men would fear and girls would adore.But as Annie learned, this power came with the burden of being at the Queen's beck and call. This would have been alright if the old cow wasn't royally off her rocker. Put simply Elizabeth X59D was a clone of the original Elizabeth the first. But not just a clone, a clone of a clone's clone. Much like inbreeding, cloning something too many times can lead to disastrous results. And now Elizabeth had the disposition of the Queen Of Hearts from that book about Wonderland.
But the pay was good. It allowed Annie to live the life she'd always dreamed of, one of comfort and excitement. But something that she was lacking was a friend, someone she could confide in. She'd never had one as the girls at Saint Mary's were as violent and vicious as any Chromagnoid. But scrolling through her pho-book, a wonderful means of connecting to others long distance, she came across the public diary of someone calling themselves "Stupor"."Today was like a dream," the entry read," I went back into the soda and creamed that punk bully with my new powers. Well, maybe that's stretching the truth. I did rough him up a bit, blocked a few punches and twisted his arm until he cried 'uncle'. Everyone cheered. I had a feeling, call it a gut one, that nobody liked him. I felt like for once in my life that I was a true hero. Sincerely yours, Stupor"